Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
