You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize