Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
The beer is more important than you right now.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
