Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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