okay pat passed out under dana's car
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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