My girlfriend figured out who you are.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
