chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I definitely pole-danced a parking meter outside a party last night. The cheering was appreciated.
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Randomize
