I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
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