On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Don't EVER smell your tampon
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize