My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
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