im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Randomize
