I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
