I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
