I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Randomize
