I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize
