No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
