stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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