dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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