dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
