Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
