i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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