I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
