so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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