Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Randomize
