me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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