oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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