Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
