Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
high people should be assigned attendants
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Randomize
