You work out of a Hotel?
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
