DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Randomize
