I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Randomize
