I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
