You're so nebulous sometimes
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
This baby is an asshole
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
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