Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Randomize
