I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
no you cant smoke seaweed
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
