You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
So vagazzling was a success
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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