I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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