we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
she smelled like a LAN party
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i want to swaddle you in tequila
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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