You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize
