5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
