Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
she texted him the burrito order while she was puking in the Del Taco parking lot...
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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