I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
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