uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Just found out what was wrong with Esther. Turns out she's 33 and still not married. This explains everything.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
He passed out mid-signature
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
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