And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize
