just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
