I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
Found your dick twin last night
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
