why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
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