Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
