You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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