She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
