the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i just made my gag reflex go away.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
