yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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